My Favorite Photos - July 2023

July seemed to fly by...most of spent working, though. So, I am happy to have had at least some quality time with family. The highlight of July was that my niece and her family moved back to Minnesota from North Carolina. 

We were able to have dinner, talk, and play games together in early July.

We've been having a lot of birds at our feeders. The grosbeaks love the seeds.

This is the male rose-breasted grosbeak. He's a lot more colorful than the female pictured above.

The wrens raised a brood of little ones. They have since fledged. I miss seeing the constant traffic and singing of the wrens each day.

We had many orioles this year and went through bottles of grape jelly. This one is a much darker orange than what we typically see.

This is another type of oriole we saw. It is still beautiful, just not as dark-orange as the other one. 

This wren caught a spider to bring back to the babies. The mother and father wren are such hard - and successful - foragers.

 We have a variety of woodpeckers here. This one is about mid-size compared to the other ones we see.

One of my favorite things to see here are deer. These two fawns somehow got into our fenced-in backyard. We found out that even as young as these two were, that fawns can easily scale a four-foot fence. 

This one was more curious and alert of the two fawns.

This fawn liked to eat more than the other one.

The mother was on the other side of the fence and had an eye on her babies until she walked around the corner and then along the fence line. She jumped into the east pasture and later on her two fawns joined her by jumping over the fence. 

This is one of the sunflowers that grew from a seed that fell from the birdfeeder. The birds now - a month later - are eating the seeds from it.

This is one of the dahlias that I grew this year from a root. It has bloomed quite a bit which I've enjoyed.

These little flowers come up every year by the back door. I need to cut the plant back throughout the summer and fall, otherwise it would take over the garden. 

We celebrated Olivia's 20 1/2 birthday in July. We still celebrate half birthdays. I don't think that will stop. 

We scaled back on the number of gifts, though, compared to past years. Two of the gifts we gave her was a Dala horse from Sweden and a silver Dala horse necklace. She really liked both gifts.

During July, we had a Girls & Dolls Tea Party at work. This is one of the dolls in a collection - a Swedish Easter Witch. Girls dress up around Easter as witches and paint their cheeks pink and put a lot of dots on their faces to represent freckles. 

Also at work is a collection of Charlotte Weibull dolls. These are two of them wearing the folk outfits from different provinces in Sweden.

Olivia entered ten projects in the county fair for her final year in 4-H. She received all blue ribbons and one reserve champion ribbon on the nautilus pictured below. It's a Diamond Dotz painting that turned out beautifully. She paid for the matting and framing which complement it nicely. 

Although she won a trip to the State Fair with this project, she decided not to go because it would be the same project area (Crafts) and with a similar project that she did last year (also a Diamond Dotz, but with a different image).

After the last day of the County Fair, we went to Dairy Queen - our traditional meal. A bittersweet meal knowing this is the last 4-H year and the last County Fair as a 4-H family.

When we came home from the County Fair, the mother deer was hiding behind a tree. She finally came out from behind the tree along with her two fawns. I love knowing that she feels safe here. She and the babies didn't rush away when they saw us. They watched us for a while and then walked off slowly. They know we are not a threat. 

My sister went to an art museum in late-July. This is one of the glass pieces in the collection.

This was a two-dimensional painting that looks three-dimensional. 

I liked this glass and metal piece. The shades of blue were beautiful.

This is a glass and cement piece. The inner part is cement and outer part is glass.

This glass piece I thought was a tube - like the kind that were outside of the Minnesota Orchestra building decades ago. It isn't. It's a solid piece with a light color of glass in the middle. It is probably about three inches wide from the front to the back. Every few steps I took past this piece, it would have a different look to it. 

These pairs look like regular-size pears, but they're not. They are about three feet tall. The subtle color on the side is from sprinkling powdered glass on the sculpture. 

At work, we have ten bluebird houses. This nest was placed well because it attracted two bluebird families. So we had ten bluebirds born this year! 

Here are some baby bluebirds later in the month. They fledged by the end of the month.

One of the projects I'm especially pleased with at work was creating four sensory kits and a box of fidgets for people with autism and sensory issues. These are all the items we purchased.

This is an example of a sensory kit that someone can check out from the museum while they are visiting. They bring it back when they are ready to go home. 

That wraps up July. I'm hoping that as the summer winds down that there will be more balance between family/home and work. Right now, it's out of balance which is challenging. 

The Out-of-Sync Child Grows Up (Book Notes)

Many years ago, I read The Out-of-Sync Child to better understand Sensory Processing Disorder (aka Sensory Integration Dysfunction) since both Olivia and Sophia have it. There was a companion book, The Out-of-Sync Child Has Fun, which had many ideas for doing engaging and fun activities with children who have SPD.

As the girls became older children and teens, the activities weren't as age appropriate. So, when I saw The Out-of-Sync Child Grows Up by Carol Stock Kranowitz I knew I needed to read it so I could learn more about how to help the girls as they went through their teenage and adult years.

The book is a combination of information about SPD, strategies for dealing with different elements of SPD, and essays by teens and parents of teens who have SPD. This blend of perspectives was very insightful and provided good information and ideas for moving forward with the girls. Many of the strategies we already use. However, there were some new ideas that we can try as well as reassurance that the girls aren't the only ones experiencing these challenges. 

Some things that stood out that I want to remember:
- Certain boys and girls respond to unremarkable experiences in remarkably unusual ways. They may resist going places and being with other people. They may reject huge...or crave them constantly. They may go, go, go...of lack get-up-and-go. They may dress sloppily, eat only pasta, drop and break everything, whimper or rage over "nothing" for no apparent reason, insist on doing things their way, and act immaturely for their age, even as they grow. With their late and slow, or rapid and intense, or otherwise "off" responses, they seem out of sync with other people and the world.
- SPD occurs in the central nervous system when one's brain can't react typically to sensory messages, coming from one's body and environment, in order to function smoothly in daily life.
- "I was 11 when I finally learned to ride a bike because of my balance issues and 18 when I learned to drive because I had trouble with space and where the car was on the road and especially with parking."

Sophia's first bike ride of the year.

(April 5, 2011)

- "I was notoriously messy. My room looked like a tornado ran through it..."
- "As you get older, you'll be more aware and in tune with your body....I have learned to control how I respond to sensory challenges."
- "I tolerate irritants, like having my teeth cleaned, because I know they will go away."

Sophia pulling out Olivia's wiggly tooth.

(April 23, 2014)

- Auditory-language skills, based on the auditory sense, enable a person not just to hear sounds and words but to understand and respond to them. Activities dependent on good auditory-language skills include:
     => Listening to the teacher, remembering and following directions
     => Articulating speech sounds clearly enough to be understood
     => Engaging in conversations, answering questions, and making apt comments
     => Using language for verbal and written self-expression
     => Using auditory feedback to self-monitor voice volume
- Imagine extreme examples of what things feel like. Imagine wearing scratchy sandpaper clothes that make you itch all over, all day. Imagine washing your face in a buck of perfume. Imagine feeling as if you're going to fall off a cliff when you walk a few steps. Imagine sitting right near the stage, next to a rock band's amplifier.
- The goal is to help all children and adults manage their sensory challenges so they can lead satisfying, productive lives.
- A subtype of Sensory Modulation Disorder is sensory over-responsivity - causing the person is a "sensory avoider" to shrink from stimuli (e.g., malodorous, spicy, jolting and prickly stimuli, but also mild everyday stimuli can quickly make the sensory avoider irritated...very irritated...or angry and thoroughly miserable."
     => Light, unexpected touch can be bothersome. Being kissed or caressed makes them uncomfortable.

Olivia wearing a fireman's hat at the 

annual fire department's open house.

This was a challenging experience wearing

the hat and something over her face.

(October 9, 2007)

- For sensory cravers, there's the interoceptive subtype. Someone can eat a whole pizza or a gallon of ice cream, and then some more, to get the sensation of being full.
- For Sensory Discrimination Disorder, there's a vestibular subtype. An example would be never learning to ride a bike because of poor coordination and balance.
- There's a visual subtype. An example is learning how to drive. A teen could have difficulty knowing where the car is on the road, where other cars are in relationship to hers, and especially how to parallel park.

Sophia is driving the Jeep so she can bring in a load of pumpkins.

She's 10 years old in this photo.

She's driving from the field and through the pasture. 

She opted not to drive through the backyard and to the driveway.

(October 16, 2011)

- The auditory (hearing) subtype means that someone could have difficulty understanding jokes and puns, a teacher's verbal instructions, or what a friend just told her.
- The gustatory (taste) subtype means that they can't discriminate when she has a bad taste in her mouth and should brush her teeth.
- Self-blame abounds. Teenagers with SPD may feel week and inadequate. They may wonder, "If other people can tolerate noise, odors, escalators, and wool mittens, if other people can keep calm in stimulating situations, if other people can do this and that, why can't I?"
- Some teens attempt to cope by turning away from other people and becoming loners.
- "If someone with SPD says something's bothering them, take it seriously. If it isn't fixed, it will get worse and worse."
- "We're just like everyone else, except more sensitive to sound, sight, touch, smell, motion...to everything in our environment."
- "If I say I need a minute or two, give me time and do not rush me. Don't punish me for needing a break."

The girls resting with some of the pets on the bed.

They would alternate between homeschooling and resting.

(April 2, 2013)

- Strategy for sensory demands that give a person trouble: Break it down into its sensory components. For example, with toothbrushing: Does the toothbrush hurt your gums? Does the taste or smell of the minty toothpaste with artificial sweeteners gross you out? Figure out what type of toothbrush works best and what type of toothpaste is palatable.
- For shaving: use a shaving cream with a texture and scent you like to help with desensitizing the skin. You can also use deep pressure to massage on the shaving cream.
- Challenges with clothing: "I don't like the tag's feel against my skin....It's too tight."
- Some teens with sensory challenges like their clothing loose; others like it tight. Some like it hot, preferring layers; other like it cold, wearing shorts, t-shirts, and sandals in the winter.

Girls wearing loose dresses. 

These were the most comfortable for them 

since they were tight against their skin.

(March 23, 2008)

- "I would scratch so hard because the pain of cuts felt better than what the clothes felt like on my skin."
- "I would take burning hot baths until my skin would turn red." (This is being under-responsive to temperatures.)
- Buy clothes a side too large; they will give you less skin friction. Or, if snug clothes are more comfortable, wear bodysuit shapewear underneath.
- Look for tagless shirts to avoid the irritation and stinging.
- At home, go barefoot or just wear socks.

Sophia cutting fabric. She wears socks in indoors.

Olivia prefers to go barefoot indoors and 

not wear socks - even when wearing shoes or boots.

(July 20, 2009)

- Consider buying "preconditioned" clothing from a consignment or thrift shop.
- In the house during the winter, use a humidifier to keep humidity in the range of 40-60 percent to reduce static and prevent dry, itchy skin.
- Find activities involving deep pressure that desensitize your skin and feel good, such as having someone push against you, being rolled over and under a big therapy ball, and relaxing under a weighted blanket.
- Always put some food on the table that the choosy eater finds acceptable.

Olivia helping make homemade pickles.

Pickles are one thing that she enjoys eating.

Lunches and dinners often times include pickles.

(September 1, 2010)

- Driving: avoid busy streets, because there may be too much going on to process the movements, noises, lights, and so on. Practice a long time on easy roads before going out on highways and more traffic.
- Do hatha yoga.
- "I became aware that I can't understand what the person next to me is saying because there is so much noise."
- When the going gets tough, sit down and pull over - and breathe. Don't push yourself past your breaking point.
- Use the time you spend traveling from place to place to learn new things. Listen to soothing music if you must concentrate on driving. Listen to audiobooks and interesting interviews if you are traveling on the bus, train, or airplane.

Music we've checked out of the library.

(Taken on June 28, 2013)

- Drape a "lap buddy" (pillow or tube sock filled with beans or fish-tank  gravel) on your thighs or shoulders to provide calming weight.
- Fidget with handheld items that are appropriate for the place (Chinese therapy balls at home, squeezable gadgets in public places).
- Advocate for yourself in a school setting and let instructors know if certain things bother you or if you need extra time and a quiet room for exams.
- Spend lots of time outdoors, ideally in the country or woods. Looking, listening, and moving outdoors will enrich your understanding not only of the subject you're studying, but also of biology and earth science.

Girls enjoying being outdoors.

They are exploring the pond in the west pasture.

(Taken on March 30, 2011.)

- Listening to instrumental music when your work involves reading and writing; and music with lyrics when work is manual - like painting or raking.
- Get at least 30 minutes of whole-body exercise preferably outdoors, every day and at least three hours before you go to bed.
- For two hours before going to sleep, avoid electronics that can interfere with relaxation and suppress the release of melatonin, which brings on drowsiness.
- Relax with a calming activity: rock in a rocking chair; take a warm bath; read a real book or magazine.

Olivia reading to Montague.

(Taken on December 3, 2012.)

- Block out house or street sounds with a fan or white noise machine.
- Ways to create a sense of belonging: Do activities together such as preparing food, walking the dog, doing errands, watching a movie, playing board games, organizing photographs, or designing scrapbooks.
- Become "compassionate collectors." A socially-active enterprise has innumerable benefits for the family and community. Not only does this work encourage mindfulness of others, but it also nourishes the sensory systems and develops praxis. Examples: grow and/or prepare food to bring to a shelter for homeless people. Collect clothes, toiletries, and cosmetics or food; and then sorting, boxing, lifting, and carrying the items to a shelter.

Sophia and Olivia with some of the books they collected

to create the first-ever library in Lesotho, Africa.

(Taken on May 30, 2012.)

- "My inability to pick up on social cues, coupled with my mental and emotional dysfunction...skewed my thought process. My extracurriculars were nonexistent."
- "I developed an addiction to the internet. When I wasn't in class, I was on the computer....I never went to parties, never drank, and never did drugs. I didn't go to parties...because I felt like I needed a direct invitation."
- "I rarely had contact with other members outside of group events....I still feel like I need permission to join in with others."
- "Accumulated sensory input, especially noise, can be way too much to handle, which is why I often isolate myself in my room with the door shut."
- "Those of us with SPD spend more time with our families than with peers, especially if family members are caring and accepting and try not to push our buttons."

The girls' First Communion.

Olivia was almost 7 years old and

Sophia just turned 9 years old.

(Taken on January 10, 2010.)

- "While our self-confidence may not grow as quickly, and we may not be as well prepared for adulthood, we still benefit greatly from having tight-knit family bonds."

The girls with my mom and me.

A rare three-generation photo.

(Taken on February 9, 2014)

One of the mothers of a daughter with SPD said, "Raising my daughter has been one of my most joyful and rewarding challenges." I couldn't agree more!

Wednesday Hodgepodge - September 6, 2017

From this Side of the Pond

1. When you think about your future what do you fear most? Hope for the most?

When I think about my future, I reflect on my parents and the struggles they had towards the end of their lives with Alzheimer's Disease, dementia, strokes, diabetes, and a heart attack. I think about the financial challenges that healthcare poses.

My parents on a trip to Pella, Iowa, during the tulip festival.

(Taken April 30, 2009.)

Fortunately, for them, my dad had a pension and both had enough savings to draw upon to cover their healthcare expenses. Had my mom lived even six months to a year longer, things could have been very different for her since at-home healthcare was quickly depleting her savings. I don't have nearly the resources or the pension that they had.

My hope lies in what I can do to make a positive impact on others - my family as well as those who I will never meet. Seeing Sophia and Olivia having hearts filled with a desire to help and serve others - that gives me an incredible sense of hope that they will continue our family's legacy of wanting to make a difference in this world.

2. September is National Chicken Month. How often is chicken on the menu at your house?

We eat chicken about once a week for dinners. Often times, there are leftovers so we'll have chicken for lunches too.

What's a favorite dish made with chicken?

When I was growing up, my mom made oven-fried chicken by putting some butter in a 9"x13" pan and melting it. She would dredge chicken pieces in liquid (milk or egg - I can't remember off-hand) and then roll them in crushed up potato chips. A healthier version is using corn flakes rather than chips.

Mom, Dad, Olivia, and Sophia having lunch together

at my parents' home.We weren't having chicken, 

but this was one of many meals we shared together.

(November 4, 2009.)

There are certainly fancier and better recipes that I've tried. This one brings back good memories of sitting together as a family having dinner, so that's why it's also a favorite recipe.

What's something you're a 'chicken' about doing or trying?

After adopting Sophia and Olivia I decided that aiming to get my private pilot's license wasn't worth it - even though I was very close to getting it.

When I was doing touch-and-go's one day (the last day that I ever flew in the pilot's seat), I had a bad landing that my flight instructor and I couldn't explain. The entire plane was shaking on impact and it was difficult to regain control of it.

This isn't the plane I was flying,

but it is similar in size to the one I flew.

Sophia and Olivia are next to this plane

at an airport show on September 8, 2007.

I asked how I could have handled it differently and why it would have occurred, he had no explanation or suggestions. I never flew after that, despite his encouragement to do so. I never wanted to go through a similar - or scarier - situation like that. 

3. What are three things you don't own but wish you did?

I'd like to own these things if money were no object:

- a fully-furnished art studio that would have multiple rooms for different types of creative arts. This would be something that we could all use plus - potentially - could be a source of income if we offered classes or studio rental time.

- a sauna to help relieve muscle and body pains.

Source

- sensory equipment for both the girls to help them with sensory processing disorder including teen/adult-size items that provide what they need, but are multi-functional (e.g., hammock, hammock swing)

Source

4. Would you rather be a jack of all trades or a master of one? Elaborate.  If you answered one, which one?

Being a jack of all trades would be more rewarding for me because I would be able to do a variety of things. My life would always be exciting because there's something different to do. Having the knowledge to do many things - even house repairs - would be satisfying for me. 

5. Ketchup or mustard? On what?

I use both ketchup and mustard on hamburgers, hotdogs, and brats when I occasionally eat them.

Olivia and I roasting hotdogs at Itasca State Park.

(Taken on September 5, 2012.)

6.  Insert your own random thought here.

We spent three days at the Minnesota State Fair last week so the girls could compete with their 4-H projects. Olivia earned a trip to the fair for her video "A Better World for Animals" and Sophia earned a trip for the website she created. Both won blue ribbons; and Sophia won a purple ribbon (grand champion).

The girls also did a joint judging for the 4-H club's One Stop Donation Drop - the big community pride project that was done in November 2016 that enefited 23 non-profit organizations.

We were able to spend one day at the fair on our own. No competing or having to oversee anyone else's schedule. It was great! One of the highlights was seeing beautiful kaleidoscopes of flowers and plants in the Ag-Hort building.

Sophia had the idea to use her iPhone to take photos of the images that were created as the flower pots were spun.  My images from my camera pale in comparison to what she was able to capture. 

Another fun thing we did that was also very relaxing was an aquamassage. You lay on a massage/chiropractic table and the top of the machine goes over you. There's a layer of thick plastic between you and the water. A powerful jet spray that is the width of your body goes from your neck to toes.

Needless to say, when we were done with the 15-minute massage, we were very relaxed and felt rejuvenated. It helped our feet and legs make it through the rest of the fair. We definitely will be doing this again next year at the fair!